It's late. I'm tired, but I can't sleep. I guess it's because I fell off the wagon and drank a Dr. Pepper at the movies tonight. I use to could drink a coke and then go to bed but maybe since I stopped drinking them for new years my body is in shock. Either way. I'm awake.
I watched Hill sleep for a while, that made me sad because he's such a little boy now and not a tiny baby anymore. I think him getting his first haircut made me totally change my perspective of him. Is that weird? He's like a little human boy now. So grown and independent with his own little identity. He's a total mama's boy, which I eat up, but time is just flying by. Way. To. Fast. Where is my tiny baby that woke up one morning to be replaced with a busy body toddler? Flash. Don't blink. It's gone. I know I've said it before and it's totally cliche, but where does the time go?
The other day Chip and I were talking about how everyone says to you when you are pregnant, "Your life is totally going to change. Things will never be the same once the baby comes." No kidding. We expect change. There is a total other person in our house that is totally dependent on us. So they were right, to an extent...but never really elaborated. We just assumed - yeah, yeah, dirty diapers, late nights, yadda yadda, but that's not it. Sure you have the normal baby things, you reprioritize your routine, some things become more important than other things that you use to thrive on, but that's still not it. "Those people" never really tell you that your life is going to change because you see things totally different. You see people totally different. Relationships change. People's colors seem to shine through, some good, some bad. It's a totally different perspective on everything, humans, emotions, activities...it has nothing directly to do with the baby...just life in general. I wish someone would have told me about this. Is it called maturing? Is it the shift in responsibilities? Is it the family unit you become with your spouse? I can't explain it, but I did want to let expectant parents know that the ol' cliche is true. Just not really in the way you are prepared for.
Strange. Deep. Conversations with Rachel, late night. No more Dr. Pepper for me. Anyway, I've just had my and Chip's conversation at the forefront of my mind since then. I wish there was an explination, which I would give if I knew the answer to...because we keep it real here on No Really....This Is My Life. I just don't want new parents to be bamboozled into thinking that when people say "your life is about to change" that it isn't 100% because you are about to birth a baby, it's all about your perspective on things you use to see in a different light. At least it was for me and Chip. Just a heads up....don't say no one warned you. No one filled us in. If I've spilled the beans on the secret oath of parenthood and am kicked out of the secret society...oops! Because what do we do on No Really....This Is My Life? expose ourselves because it's truly my life. Wouldn't have it any other way.
So now I've come to sit in bed and snuggle with my Goose, but her breath stinks really bad so that lasted like 2.5 seconds. Chip is on the coast this week so I'm awake, bored and it's officially way past my bedtime at 11:10 pm. I guess I'll listen to Hill snore through the monitor, Katie Lou snore next to me, Foster breathe hard and Foxy Mama tap dance back and forth across our wood bedroom floors with her clankity toenails. 6:30 comes early when Hill's internal alarm clock goes off and I repeatedly start praying "Lord, baby Jesus, please let him go back to bed and give me 30 more minutes of sleep." Some mornings I think God hears my prayers. The other 362 days of the year I poke Chip to get up. Unfortunately, Chip's not going to be here in the morning...which is in 7 hours. Dang Dr. Pepper