What in the world does thirty six equals forty one mean? What it means is that my baby is a giant and is measuring 41 weeks now when I'm only 36 weeks along. Yes, go back to my post a week ago....it said at 35 weeks he was measuring 37 weeks....7lbs....big baby...yadda yadda yadda. How is that possible since I've only gained a pound since last week? Ok, so who has a baby that grows 3 weeks in one week making him 5 weeks bigger than gestated? Oh that would be me, the lady carrying the Hawkins baby.
What to do about a big squeezable baby? Well, leave him in there of course. Make his mama wait to kiss those cheeks and eyes. He isn't ready to come out either. Heart beat is strong at 140 beats per minute, but there has been Zero dilation, Zero effacement, Zero ripening of the cervix.....but he has a head down there, Dr. North felt it. I guess you can't rush perfection....nor do I want to.
You take your time sweet Hill-y poo. Mama doesn't mind the sore hips, janked up back, never being able to get up or down, waddling everywhere, buying stock in Charmin for the 5 rolls I use a day, this crazy "mask" from hormones on my face that make up won't cover up, not being able to tie my shoes, finding shoes that don't stink (I will elaborate another day) and also the undying need for fountain cokes 24-7. Oh, and we can't forget the swollen legs and cankles or the beautiful stretch marks that if you get any bigger I'll just be a walking stretch mark or look like octomom. I really truly don't mind all that because I want what is best for you, the not so tiny one that I love dearly.
Plus, Dr. North IS going to the Cotton Bowl from the 31st through the 2nd and reiterated that I am not going, but Chip could. Punk. He doesn't think the baby will make his debut then and is still holding out until January 14th. I'm gonna need medication.......lots of medication like to function in daily life if this baby waits until the 14th. We may want to go ahead and get Guinness Book people lined up because at this rate of growth this kid will be measuring 60 weeks by that time. He'll be ready for college...probably the size of a line backer!
Poor Dr. North. He couldn't keep a straight face when he measured from the bottom to the top of my belly. As he was checking the heart beat he still had a smug look on his face...finally I said what is up with the face? Why are you smirking? He said...you have a big baby in there.
He said he was also laughing because my friend Allison uses him and I asked Dr. North earlier why if he decided to induce would he not give an epidural before breaking my water? Allison said that was the most awful part of delivery. Dr. North did his whole doctorly thing and gave medical explanation....but then chuckled because he said Allison wasn't supposed to remember any of that once the baby got here. All those bad painful memories were suppose to be wiped away. I said well obviously it made a lasting impression 3 different times for her and I vote for the epidural before any tinkering down there goes on. Maybe I do want to have this baby while he goes to the Cotton Bowl? Spare me!
So in a nutshell, when will Hill be here? If you ask Dr. North - - January 14th. Chip asked since he is so big would we have to have a c-section....the answer - probably so. (Which was followed up by the sarcastically funny - but then you won't have to worry about the pains of my breaking your water!) So does any of this tell us anything we don't already know......absolutely not. We just continue waiting until next Monday at 3:30 when he tells me Hill is measuring 82 weeks and we are still shooting for the 14th of January. Love me some Dr. North. He's a keeper!