Friday, March 30, 2007

I admire Ree for taking on a new lifestyle and becoming the pioneer woman. She's my inspiration. Although I do not know her personally we are BFF.

I feel as though we have a common ground. Not necessarily in the same light, but as far as taking on new ways of living. Her living was filled with pedicures and shopping but is now filled with hot cowboys and awesome pictures and calf nuts. While mine is now filled with close mindedness, poor grammar and then quite possibly a new story on my top 10 list of "things that could only happen where I live."

Yesterday I was with my sister in law and she wanted to stop and pick up the local paper. I had a headache so I wanted to grab a couple of Advil and a drink. We went to the nearest gas station and found a crowd of people standing out back near the car wash. The curious human I am, I too went to check out the excitement to find the perfect new joke for Jeff Foxworthy - "You might be a Redneck". A beat up old blue and white single cab truck had pulled into the automatic car wash to shine her up - there's nothing wrong with that - unless you have selected the 7 cycle automatic pressure wash and vortex dryer while you have a garbage bag taped to your drivers window. Friends, I do wish I had my camera. We all stared on as the wash started. Cycle 1 was light, just a prewash. Cycle 2 was a little more aggressive, Cycle 3 reverted back to some "special soap" lightly sprinkled on.......then Cycle 4 came full force - although you couldn't see the guys face through the black bag window you could see the impressions of his arms trying to hold it up as it violently attacked him. By this time they had pretty much closed down the gas station because all the cashiers were outside checking out this idiot. Once the vortex dryer came though the guy in the truck had had it with the garbage sack he pulled the remainder down and wadded it up into a ball. Now with a transparent view of the crowd watching him - he pulled out of the wash and next to the gazers - the only words spoken were from an old man in a snap up shirt and jeans -- "Jew get wet?" The guy went on to say how the motor in his window went out and he can't roll it up - he then was showing the on lookers how he had all the parts to fix it, but hasn't had the time..........ummmm. What? You might be a Redneck.

Welcome to my life.......Ree, wanna switch places?

1 comment:

Lisa Blair said...

OMG, this is so funny! The fact that a crowd of people gathered to watch this dumbass just makes it more funny. Yeah, you just might be a Redneck if you take your garbage bag patched pick-up thru the car wash!