Why I'm not a mommy

There are many many many many reasons why I don't have kids at this point in my life. I won't get into all the reasons, but I just discovered a new reason today at lunch. My niece will be having her 1st birthday party at our house tomorrow. I needed to go get her some fun toys for this glorious occasion, so I went to Wal-Mart. There are billions of kids toys, and I was trying to make sure they were age appropriate, I didn't want to get her anything a 5 year old can barely figure out. I was extremely disappointed to see the Power Wheels they had were for ages 3 and up and the trikes seemed stupid to me. So I called my sister in law and she said - get anything Leap Frog, she'll love it. They have a whole section of Wal-Mart dedicated to this Leap Frog stuff...so then I went and distinguished which age area I needed, punched all the buttons and made the cow moo - and the pig oink - the car vrroom, and then this cute little Alphabet Pal Caterpillar caught my eye. It has different settings where you can play music, it says the letter when you push on a specific leg....but then it has another setting where it pronounces the letter. So I press on A and it says Ahh, then Buh, then Kaa, Duh, Eah, Fuh....I pressed the F again to hear Fuh again. Then I thought it would be funny to press the F and the K, but Leap Frog has out smarted the adults as well. What it does is say "Fuh", then when you press the K it says "Ha ha, that tickles. Kuh" So it won't say it together. So of course I had to try every curse word I could think of. Another one it does it to is Ass. "Ahh, Ha Ha that tickles, SSS" It lets you do Sss hh Ihh tah, but that's like 4 letters at one time. Seemingly it's just the 2 syllable words.
This is reason number 46348759838402 why I'm not ready for kids, because I make good toys try to be bad.